"Cut"

Reviewed by: Shortstick

(3 outta 5)

Kill Count: 11

"Cut" was actually a somewhat entertaining flick. Great it wasn't, but for the most part, the films we watch for "The Stink Yard" here at YMR are pretty terrible. If we make it through a movie without myself or Giggles wondering how much more time we are going to be tortured, it's a moral victory. Movies like "Cut" at least keep us from trying to tear our faces off as a cure for boredom.

In the aftermath of the "Scream" phenomenon, the teenage slasher flick became a viable genre once again. Most of the movies made in post-"Scream" era seemed to forget that the film responsible for the revival of the genre was making fun of said genre. The folks who made "Cut" seemed to forget this as well, but they pressed on and made yet another TSM (teenage slasher movie).

The premise of "Cut" might not have been original, but they still had some decent ideas. During the filming of "Hot Blooded", a fictional (duh!) horror movie, somehow the slasher from the movie comes to life and kills a few people on the set, including the director, played by none other than Kylie Minogue. Cut to a few years later (sorry, I just had to put a "cut" pun in this article somewhere), and a group of college students want to finish making "Hot Blooded" for their class project in some film class. It seems like a good idea until the killer makes his triumphant return and starts picking off students at an astonishing rate.

Before Kylie became a world-wide sensation once again, she was reduced to playing small roles in second rate horror flicks. I would have still done the "Locomotion" with her either way.

You know, Molly Ringwald is still pretty hot. Interestingly enough, she plays a washed up actor in "Cut". Sometimes movies can be way too much like real life!

Early on, we see "Scar Man" wield his powers. Pretty typical slasher if ya ask me, but he does have a penchant for killing. I dunno if "Scar Man" is a cool name for a slasher though. Perhaps "Rose Pruner" would have been a better name for him.

Shouldn't they just volunteer to be killed by the "Rose Pruner?" It doesn't seem like a wise idea to try to finish a movie where a bunch of folks got killed the first time around. College students can sure be dumb sometimes...

Apparently, "Hot Blooded" became quite the cult classic after the killings. All we could think of every time the movie was discussed or shown was the Foreigner song (link is to the lyrics) of the same title. It's been a while since we watched the movie, but I still have the song stuck in my head. Damn you Foreigner!

Using the internet for research? What were these college kids thinking? The internet should only be used for viewing porn, stealing music, and visiting Youngmanridge.com!

I can't figure out if this shot was from the movie or real life. Molly really can't have much more to do than practice her golf game these days. No matter, she is still pretty hot.

New Youngmanridge rule:

"No translucent shower doors while chicks are rinsing off. It's all or nothing baby!"

Not to take away from a pretty good death scene, but film makers elect to show us this shit but they can't show a titty here and there?

You know what would have gone nice with this shot? BOOBIES!

Somewhere hidden behind the old ladies dress is a nice rack.

I don't even know what to say about this scene. It sort of revolts me to see a dog licking blood, but I couldn't look away. I don't blame the dog though cause they are the same creatures that think shit is a gourmet snack.

Doesn't this guy look like Dolph Lundgren dressed up as Freddy Krueger? It might have taken almost the whole movie, but we finally learned why this guy is called "Scar Man"

Most of the time I would make some stupid joke like "too bad this didn't happen for real yo!". Since Cut didn't really suck, I'll save it for later. Anyhow, perhaps I should explain the phenomenon of "Scar Man". Every time someone watches "Hot Blooded" (cue the Foreigner song), this guy comes back to life. To kill him, you gotta destroy the film. Cut might have been cookie-cutter most of the time, but there were some threads of originality thrown about from time to time.

This is just really an attempt to put more Molly Ringwald into the review. She might be older and washed up, but you can't say she doesn't look good for her age. I wouldn't mind seeing how pretty her pink is.

You would think that maybe word would have reached America to destroy all the "Hot Blooded" prints in existence after the terrible tragedy. Of course, this wouldn't allow for a sequel, but do you think "Cut 2" is going to see the light of day?