The
Master List or....
Things
we learned from the Discovery Channel while impared..
Page 4
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the .pdf
- I don’t know about you, but
I’m keeping my fucking earlobes.
- I can tell John is gay by the way
he walks.
- Cigarettes and piercing aren’t
that original.
- Hey, let’s hang fat tattooed
guys by their flab. That’s fun.
- There’s gay John driving in
Africa, acting like he’s all hard.
- Can you imagine Vader smoking some
weed?
- Another name for midichlorians is
THC.
- We’re going down to Africa
and steal us some hooka-coals.
- What’s gay John doing? Why,
he’s still driving in Africa, acting like he’s the
shit.
- Some guy just hammered a nail into
his head!
- That shit he just dropped on his
tongue was acid.
- Drugs make you go native.
- Since when did Hindus start sticking
shit in their mouths?
- When outdoors amongst hornets and
wasps, using a straw in your soda can save your life.
- Whitetail spiders melt off your fucking
hand?!?
- He’s stupid but he’s wize.
- There’s nothing wrong with
drugs. You take them when you’re sick to make you better---
shit, you take them to make you better when you’re perfectly
fine.
- And you take them to get better,
when you’re already better.
- Your sloppy seconds are better than
a lesbian girlfriend.
- “This is perfectly fine. It
hasn’t spoiled. It tastes like licorice.”
- “Yeah, I bet that’s what
cyanide tastes like.”
The notorious
white-tale spider |
- I didn’t care for music in
the 80s. It was all faggy.
- Oh no, but on a more serious note…
have you ever heard of weed-angels?
- You know how scary it would be to
fall off Niagara Falls?
- I wouldn’t flirt with a great
white shark, if I were you.
- Secrets aren’t advertised on
the travel channel.
- Crypts and cellars are under our
city.
- What? You’re fucking wollering
like a walrus.
- This Channel de Travel is starting
to irk me. Let’s turn back to Discovery.
- Did you know that cheese is a weed
magnet?
- Roachito’s revamping of a time
honored classic: “Stoned again… I just can’t
wait til I get stoned again.. oh how I love bein’ high with
my friends. I just can’t wait til I stoned again!”
The epitome
of faggy 80's music |
- I get lost in my own house…
but it’s worth it.
- I’m going to snag some of these
taffies.
- The meaning of life is divorce.
- These guys are just drug hounds looking
for a place to get high.
- Beavers are engineering marvels.
- Beavers should be revered as Gods.
- A 60 lbs beaver! Holy shit!
- When they pause they unload water
from their fur.
- Beavers are advanced, dude.
- We like eager beavers.
Snatchy is an
eager beaver. Read about Snatchy here. |
- I’d hate to stumble into a
beaver den.
- Beavers have to eat shit, and they
make sounds that sound like they’re fucking all the time.
- Beavers are tribal.
- The thick layer of body hair acts
like a giant sensory organ. (Siedman)
- The 10 inches of strength enable
it to overcome larger creatures. (Siedman)
- 6 gilled sharks like deep dark water.
- All dealers in Vegas are either gay
or Asian.
- The lack of armor allowed it to have
considerable flexibility.
- They use a shoe-sizer to measure
my cock.
- I gotta got to Big-5 just to size
my cock.
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